Ziddi

Outlook of a female wanderer

Dillagi

There is a thin line between flirting(dillagi) and love(ishq). 

This poem tells the difference. 

Music By - Krishna Chalwetkar

Gussa

तुम  हसीन , सूरज की उत्तेजना हो, 

तुम ही, कोहिनूर की प्रेरणा हो, 

वीराना रात, मुझे हर पल तड़पाता है, 

सबसे ज्यादा, तेरा गुस्सा याद आता है । 

घूर के देखा, आँखें बड़ी हो जाती थी ,

कुछ न बोलकर , भी तू डरा जाती थी ,

गुस्से  प्यार तुझपर आता है ,

यारा, तेरा गुस्सा याद आता है । 

तू शांत भी है, और चंचल भी, 

सफ़ेद कमल, रंग बिरंगी तितली भी, 

तेरी शरारतें, दिल हंस के रो देता है,

मुझे तेरा गुस्सा याद आता है । 

कुछ न कहा, सब समझ गयी तुम,

आँखों से बातें कर लेते थे हम, 

तुम साथ हो तो, रोना भी अच्छा लगता है,

तेरा गुस्सा बड़ा याद आता है । 

तंग किया, बहुत सताया है तुमने,

डांटा भी, गले लगाया भी तुमने,

तुम हो तो अँधेरा भी रंगीन लगता है,

शायद इसलिए, तेरा गुस्सा याद आता है । 

Together

It was a normal day like ever. I and my friend Naval were out for a stroll. I have been working for 8 months now and he is preparing for higher studies after completing college. We were roommates in college and now share a rented flat. We both work hard and once I come back, we go out for a stroll and have some snack. The cool evening breeze and random people doing things which often turn out funny are our source of entertainment. We cross the park where the elderly are taking laughter therapy and that always bring a smile on our face. I hate when I get late from office and we have to miss it.

“1 rupee.” A small child kept uttering it and following us. We walked for seconds and then I scolded him to make him run away. I hate beggars. This is the worst thing one can do for a living. People are even ashamed to send kids for begging and spoil their future. It’s already frustrating to handle the demands of the manager at office, keep being pestered by society of having a job with minimal salary when most of my friends are earning almost twice than me. All of the frustration came out on that harsh scolding. It scared the kid enough to run away. Naval didn't say a word and kept walking.

“We have never seen beggars at this place, I just hate them.”

Naval just nodded and went to the patties shop. We had our patties and went back. Three more days have passed and we would always find someone begging. A lady with a small child, a small boy with a half pant and green dirty t-shirt. A girl in a pink frock holding a doll with a missing eye. They generally catch couples or elderly because they are more generous. However, we were always approached but never followed. Guys are emotionless, is a universal accepted phenomenon.

It had been a bad day for me. My friend gave me the good news of his new job, I congratulated him and felt disappointed. While I was still busy mourning, my manager came and ask about the work. I was late on schedule so he took out all his frustration on me. The laughter therapy was also not making me smile. The kid came and asked us for money, he had no hope of getting it so was already searching for a potential target. Naval took out a small box of biscuit and gave him. He ran away almost snatching it.

“You shouldn't promote begging.” I was not angry but disappointed, and he was even challenging my beliefs.

“They are kids, it’s not their fault. It’s their parent’s fault, why to hate them for it. I never give them money but biscuits or chocolates. Just look at them.”

I turned and searched for him. He was right there beneath the banyan tree with his sister. He was pointing at us and trying hard to open the biscuit wrapper. He used his teeth to open it. They both were more excited than what I would have been on getting a salary hike. Yes, it was worth it. I knew naval very well, we would now be having veg patties than cheese patties to compensate it.

I walked back home and I was happy. May be money is important but being happy with yourself and sharing happiness is even more important. I have always kept few toffees in my pocket since that day.

Housing.com shares this spirit of optimism and being together.

Rise Above fear

First of all, let me tell you what my fear is. Acropobia – fear of heights. I am scared to go to any floor above 4^th and lean on the balcony. Seeing the ground from that level scares the shit out of me. Well, I don’t think anyone except my mother knew this because as a kid everyone used to tease me for it.

My elder brother called me on a random day and asked if I wished to go on a training for Paragliding session. I was damn sure that he is joking so I said, "Why not". He didn’t say much so we did some random talk. Next day I had a flight ticket and the itinerary of the course. It mentioned the various do’s n don’ts. Now I was shitty scared and had no options even, not much money was going to be refunded. My sister was also accompanying, so just to show myself strong I went along with the flow.

The training started with groundwork. It was a lot of physical exercise and you learnt to handle the glider on ground. It was very tiring but I enjoyed it. The next level we went to a height of 80 feet from sea level and jumped from there. But it was actually a slope so I was never at a height of more than 20 feet from ground. It was fun and I enjoyed it. Actually I was doing better than both my brother and sister.

The next day we went to a height of 300 feet. The 300 feet gap was clearly visible. It was a straight drop. The wind was vigorous so we waited for it to calm. Every second was just initiating more adrenaline to my body asking me to run back to the camp. After around half an hour the wind calmed down and we started. The trainer went first and I already said that I was not going to do it. My brother laughed and said that he will go first. My sister who is younger than me wished to go second. Being the elder one it hurt my ego and I planned to go second.

I took the flight. My feet left the ground and I was in complete suspension. It was just me and the glider and the radio on which I was getting commands, all together at a height of 300 feet. It was a beautiful place. In the earlier half an hour I was mesmerized by its beauty. Huge lake surrounded on all side by mountains. The place where we were supposed to land was at a horizontal distance of around 1 km and was surrounded by water bodies from three side. It was just perfect for people who are going to do it, just once in their life. We were also told that there are high tension wire just next to the mountain but we don’t need to worry about it. Also if we land on water then, a lot of chances are there that we might sink in. None of it was helping.

When my feet just left the ground I was looking at my target. The place where I was supposed to land. People often describe the scenic beauty while trying such things and how they fell in love with nature. Nothing happened to me. I was just focused at my target and hell with nature. When I successfully landed I finally was relieved. Everyone training with us was talking about how beautiful was the view from above and I was silently proud of myself for being able to do it.  

I don’t know if my fear is gone or not but I want to go back and enjoy the nature this time. It was indeed one of the best gift given to me.

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Baatein

नयी जगह, नये लोग,
हिचकिचाहट को, तोड़ देते हैं,
कई रास्ते, एक मंज़िल,
चलो बातें करते हैं |

कई दोस्त, कुछ ख़ास होंगे,
हर के अपने ज़ज़्बात होते हैं,
बना लेते हैं, यादों का किला,
चलो बातें करते हैं |

कोई गिर गया, तो उठा लेंगे,
कोई छूट गया, तो ढूँढ लेंगे,
याराना होगा, किताबों में शामिल,
चलो बातें करते हैं |

प्यार होगा, मोब्बत होगी,
देख उनको, आहें भरते हैं,
बड़ा ही प्यारा है ये समा,
चलो बातें करते हैं |

ये वादियाँ, हसीन है,
एक दूसरे को तंग करते हैं,
क्या पता फिर मिले ना मिले,
चलो बातें करते हैं |

Stop Laughing

Richa was coming from the front. A drop of sweat trickled down Raj’s face. He stopped his hastening to and fro movements and stood still like the statue in the nearby park. 

Blue salwar, white kameez, a flick of kohl in the eyes. 4 metal bangles on each hand, beaded earrings, a thin nose ring and a smile on her charming face. She was dark, not chocolate dark but enough not to be called fair. She jerked her head to let the strip of her hair flow back behind her ears. It would however come back any second.

They have been in the relationship for 3 years. Anyone would have fallen in love with her queer prankish personality. She came and proposed and he immediately said yes. The couple was a symbol of love and trust.

“You are sweating. Did I make you wait very long?” Richa held her ears with a tensed cute look.

“Naah, I came early. Need something to drink. Let’s go.” They took the last seat of the restaurant to maintain their privacy.

“You know, my mom is taking me for shopping today. It’s my brother’s marriage after all. I will leave in an hour.”

“I wanted to say something.”

“Since when did you start asking permission from me? You are the bossy one here.” Richa smirked but she felt the awkward silence. She kept her palm over his.

“We need to break-up.” Raj said for the first time looking straight in her eyes.

“What?” Drops of cold coffee spread over the table as she coughed. A pool flew out of the glass with the jolt and successfully landed on the red carpet. The straw took 3 merry go round trips and preferred to stay in the glass.

“I don’t like golgappe but eat it to keep you happy. We don’t have anything more to talk about at our night calls. You started lying to me about your friends. We are not so excited to meet each other like earlier. You talk more about your family than us. You would not miss classes anymore to go out for a movie with me. You have started scolding me for things you don’t like.” He said it all in one go. Every excuse he had thought of giving her.

She was gazing him right in the eyes. He couldn’t take it anymore and lowered his head. He was well prepared for a slap in the public and he deserved it. He was ready for it all.

“Ok.”

That was a calm reply. He was shocked and lifted his head up in amazement. She was walking away whistling. Instead of being enraged, she left him in astonishment.

“Wait, STOP.”

She halted and turned.

“Would you not say anything? Are you not mad at me? You would have been hurt but you are happy. I just can’t believe it.”

She stood there laughing. The laugh was even more infuriating than the whistle.

“Would you really not do anything to save our relationship?” His frustration was catching more eyes. 

“Please stop laughing.” He screamed.

The laugh stopped but the smile remained.

“I would come running after you. Do every silly bit till whatever it will take, to get us back together. But first…”

She took the dramatic pause. How could she miss the expressions on his face. He was eagerly waiting for her to finish the sentence. His expressions changed 100 times per second from all fear, astonishment, worry, and what not.

“But first, Learn to live without me.”

She walked away laughing hysterically. 

He & Her Birthdays

Raj woke up and didn’t find her beside on the bed. The clanking of utensils from the kitchen signaled that she had woken up early today. He got up, took a big yawn and moved towards the bathroom to clean his teeth.

Richa was preparing a cake in the kitchen. She remembers every date that brought a change in their life. She loves celebrating each one of them. He however has to be reminded of them. He can’t even recall the occasion by mentioning the date.

But birthdays are always special. Why to ruin it if he doesn't remember it. A cake and the surprise would bring excitement to his face. We will go to a movie in the evening and dine at their favourite restaurant. No, we will do candle light dinner today. Richa had been thinking while applying icing to the perfectly baked cake.

It had been four years of their marriage. Not for a single time he remembered to wish her. She has now got accustomed to it. Birthdays are not so special for Raj. He wouldn’t celebrate even his birthday if Richa wouldn’t force him to. She forgives him now but celebration should not be affected.

“Good morning.” Richa came out of the kitchen.

Raj replied back with his face still inside the newspaper.

“Do you remember what it is today?”

Richa was very eager to find the same surprise look on his face. She would then let him make some wild guess until she lose patience and tell him.

“Oh yeah, I do. I have to fill this date in some documents every other month.”

Raj's face had a smile. He was confused and a little happy. The same look had started coming to Richa's face while her happiness was decreasing.

“It’s my birthday.” Raj exclaimed.

Richa brought out the cake hidden behind her and bumped it on the dining table. The cherry on the top tumbled down the floor.

Raj on seeing the cake, excitedly leaped towards it.

“You forget my birthday every year but remember yours. How selfish.” Richa slapped Raj, went inside the room and locked it.

Raj stood there perplexed holding the knife in his hand whether to cut the cake or not.

The best ones

“You are always chatting with him. You sure he is not your boyfriend.” Richa asked priya.

“I told you many times, we are just friends. The best ones.” She put extra stress on her last sentence to frustrate her.

“You are so close to him, don’t you love him?”

“Yes, of course I do. I don’t know what this love is but I like everything just the way it is. And I am sure that this will also be his reply.”

“Ok, what’s your favourite hangout place?”

She looked out of her laptop screen and to her, for the first time. Even she was not looking at her and busy combing her hair. She smiled thinking about her answer.

“We don’t have one. We never hung out much.”

“WTF”, the comb dropped and both of them got full attention.

“How did you both got so close and all those trust on each other things came up?”

“I don’t know. We were totally different from each other and we both just got better friends with time. We did meet occasionally and talked. May be that’s why this friendship is so special.”

“I get it. That’s why you don’t have a single gift given from him. Every one of those dumb head friend I made have always hit on me. And girl you are way prettier than me.”

“I haven’t got your attitude.”

“How come he never hit on you? Is he gay?”

Priya punched her lightly.

“No, seriously. Are you the only girl he talks with? May be that’s why you are so special for him.”

“He is a big time flirt. He would have dated more people than you have. But he never flirts with me. Although he calls me his girlfriend and promise to pester me till I find someone.”

The smile with occasional laugh about the memories made Richa feel so jealous.

“Yaar, make him my boyfriend. I need someone like him.”

“It is better you don’t. That’s the only bad thing about him. He will date you, flirt with you and then 

leave without any explanation. I don’t understand when he became like this.”

Richa saw her feeling sad and lost somewhere else. She needed to bring her back.

“Why don’t you both go in a relationship? You would be perfect.”

She looked at her and back to the laptop screen. He had been pinging her question marks for long time.

“That’s the reason I have a best friend and you don’t.”

Richa understood her friendship for the first time. 

Faith and Fate

Raj was listening to the preachings very consciously. Guruji was talking about the behavior of the heart at the time of death. The thumping and then the silence. He was so calm and peaceful. His charisma draw Raj towards him.

“Come here son.” Guruji called Raj after the lecture. He stood perplexed for a moment and then hurried to him, tumbling and managing his things. Guruji don’t talk to anyone much. He tried many times but Guruji never allowed anyone. Death was not something to be talked about like idiots. Guruji was a spiritual teacher but he had a special command when describing death. His followers believed that he has met with death more than once.

“I have seen you here often. They tell me that you are roaming around the Ashram and trying to learn from other people.”

“Guruji, I want to know the truth about death. I am scared of it but don’t want to be.”

“You look from a nice family son, must have a good job also. WHY?”

“Yes, I had a job which others dream of. I got bored of it. I want to understand what a relationship is. Why we are so much attracted and bonded with some people but not with others? Most of all I want to know, if there is an afterlife?”

There was a shine in Guruji’s eyes.

“How long have you been here? Your family knows about it?”

“Yes, they know. They tried a lot to convince me to come back but have left hope now.”

“Ok, go out and wait in the meditation room. Someone will come and tell you, what needs to be done.”

The smile of joy changed into that of victory. Guruji had accepted to teach him. He waited for more than an hour but no one came. His phones had already been taken at the gate of the Ashram so was very bored. But he knew, every great achievement needs a lot of patience.

A man in a saffron cloth wrapped around his body, came to him. He had never seen him before. He took out a straight razor and signaled him to sit straight. His head was shaved and was given a saffron Kurta. It was too wide for him but he didn’t raise a single question. He knew the silence meant that he was not going to be answered. The guy then rolled the carpet and showed a hidden path. He followed him. The dungeon was quite dark and creepy. He was not scared. He had stayed hours in graveyard trying to understand death.

“You are now ready.” The voice of guruji echoed. The guy disappeared.

Guruji came infront of him and started to roam around. The dungeon was dark enough and he was finding it hard to follow Guruji’s movement, standing few feet away from him.

“You wanted to see death right.”

Raj just nodded. He didn’t know he was too excited or scared but he couldn’t turn back now.

“Have a good look then, you are standing with death.”

Raj looked around trying to understand the dungeon for the first time.

A knife swiftly touched his ribs leaving a stream of blood. LED lights flashed in the dungeon.

“Next lecture, I will tell how eyes behave at the time of death.” Guruji said in his calm voice, pleasantly resting Raj’s head in his lap. 

Dream - I forgot mine

Raj let his hand drop without any effort. Claps and claps, followed it. What a pleasant voice he had. His hands moved so swiftly over the guitar as if a rider was caressing his horse. Everyone came and praised him. Some suggested him to go for auditions at various competitions. Some just compared him with great singers. He was the star of the party for the next five minutes.

Everyone got busy in themselves and started to talk about their family and how frustrated they were with their job. Raj was packing his guitar in the backpack. 

"Would you mind if I can have a hand at your guitar?"

Mithun, his mentor was standing right infront of him. He got hold of the guitar like it was a baby. His eyes were shining as if he had met a lost friend after decades. Raj had never seen a man in 50’s with such love towards a musical instrument.

“How often you play it?” asked mithun, feeling the guitar strings. He then gave a gentle stroke to it.

“Not much, the office hours are too hectic to spare time for it. I used to play it in my college life.”

“You are good with it. You should spend even more time with it or you would regret it later.”

Raj knew what was going to come next. An old man finding his college love again but he knows they have to part once more. He is now tied to bonds of family, children, worrying about future and everything else.

“You know I always wanted to be a singer. We even started a band and won at many college fest. But money is too important in life. Just a single dream to became a rockstar, but I had to give up mine.”

“You are young kiddo, you would be 25 or something right.”

“26 to be exact.”

“You can make your own band, go play at weekends. Join music enthusiast clubs.”

“I would surely do, but almost every weekend you give some work to do from home. Spare me this week and I will give it a try.”

Raj smirked, he knew it was going to be a tough call for Mithun now.

“Why don’t I give you a leave this Friday?” Mithun raised his eyebrows and then laughed.

Raj stood there confused.

“There is a small club of around 50 members, all IT professionals. They organize a competition every quarter. It’s happening in the Red Clubhouse this Friday. Go and give a shot. The winner gets to perform his piece with one of the reputed bands.”

Raj couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Mithun was a very serious kind of fellow. He was the last person he expected to say these words.

Mithun who had walked few steps away halted and turned back.

“I forgot to tell you, Practise hard. I have still not given up on my dreams.” 

Broke-up - Still friends

He held the screen fixed infront of his eyes. The green dial option was shaking and teasing him to use it. Seemed that it finally lost hope and the screen went off. Raj had been trying to call her. Her name was pressed from the contacts books in more than two minutes. It had been 10 minutes since he had not pressed the call button. His screen timeout had reached.

The phone vibrated. ‘Richa calling’ flashed on the screen. He forgot to switch from vibrate to ringtone. The mobile kept vibrating and he kept blankly looking at it. No feelings, no thoughts. He picked up the call and slowly brought the phone to his ears.

“Helllooooo. Raj?”

“Happy Birthday, Richa.”

“Aww, thank you. But you forgot na. You forgot my birthday. You were always the first one to call.” A very cheerful, excited voice was coming from the other end.

“Oh no, I didn’t.” his voice was heavy than usual. “I must have lost track of time.”

“You didn’t. Leave. Where is my gift?”

“I can’t do this.” Even heavier voice mixed with pain came out.

“Raj.” A pause followed. “We broke up but that doesn’t mean it will end our friendship. We will still remain good friends right.”

Silence was there and both needed it.

“Ok, where do you want the treat? Let’s meet at the Tikki wala, I haven’t been there for a long time. Don’t be shocked, we will then go to a good restaurant and have proper dinner.”

He was listening and breathing.

“You will come right?” The voice was a little concerning this time.

“Yes, I will surely come.” Raj said in a confident voice.

He removed his finger from the doorbell. Kept the mobile in his pocket. Placed the bouquet of flower on the doorstep and left.

Love triangle - boy, girl and religion

“I love you Ankita.”

“Even I like you faraz but we are from different religions. We can’t be together. No-one will support us. It’s better not to start a relationship which is impossible to exist. ”

“What if I change my religion?”

She gave an irritated look and left.

Thousands of questions were going in her mind. What if he really does? Could they be together then? What if he just wishes to listen her answer and would not change his religion. Like flowcharts, If, Yes and No were making a lot of outcomes. Some would bring a smile and others would confuse her even more.

They met again tomorrow like every other day. But today, both were uncomfortable. He was the first to start the conversation.

“You didn’t reply to my question yesterday. What if..?"

Ankita stopped him in between, she was prepared for the answer. She had wasted whole night and was ready to give response to his any argument. She had already done this conversation hundreds of time playing both the roles.

“Firstly, I don’t want you to change your religion. You should not do that for anybody.”
She went on and on and he was calmly listening. She finished but unprepared for his reply.

“You know even if I had been of same religion and caste, you would not have fallen in love with me. The problem is not religion but you don’t want to fight the society. You are just too scared. You just needed to found out one reason not to fall in love.”

“Yes, I am. You should be too. You can’t survive being anti-social.”

There was a pause and they could each hear other’s breath. Ankita could feel the difference. He was still calm. She knew, he is neither stupid nor arrogant to understand her words. But yes, something else was driving him right now.

“How could you be so confident of us being together?”

Another pause. He kept staring at her.

“I would have to break my every relation to be with you. My family would abandon me for sure. Tell me why should I be with you then?”

Faraz smiled.

“LOVE. I would never leave you, no matter what.”

With You

Ask for love, I would give it to you,

Try to smile, I would laugh with you,

Light a hope, I would shine for you,

Leave me later, why can’t I be with you.

Ask a shoulder, I would weep with you,

Be the weird, I would be crazier than you,

Say the words, I would sing for you,

My heart is with me, it looks better with you…

Try to sleep, there would be silence and you,

Walk the road, there would be shores for you,

Climb the hill, there would be stars by you,

Don’t give me hope, when I can’t be with you.

Listen to your heart, I am ready to follow you,

Come little closer, I just wanna hold you,

Have some faith, I still only love you,

Just answer with yes, Can I be with you?

HeadPhones

“Sorry, baby. I was stuck with some work. I hope you didn’t wait for long.”

Raj smirked. “Don’t worry, I have now got used to it.”

Richa hugged him and held her ears till a smile brightened his face.

“What did you do all this time. Must have been looking at those cameras and mobiles and other electronic junks.” 

“Yup, I actually bought one.”

“Ahhhh, ok, I am hungry, let’s first get something to eat.”

“Hmmm, you go and take a seat I will order two coffee and some snacks.”

Richa opened the purse and checked her looks while raj went and ordered.

“So what did you buy today?”

“I got a very good deal. I purchased these headphones at a very low price.”

“Oh wow, how much?” She took the headphones and struggled to find the price tag.

“It was just for 2000 bucks and it got a very good surround sound…”

“2000 bucks!” her loud voice just surprised him. “And you say it’s cheap.”

“Common, it’s SkullCandy. SKULLCANDY.” Noticing she had never heard the name before, he felt disappointed. “You atleast try it for once.”

“Yeah, whatever candy it is. I don’t understand you guys. Why do you waste so much money on these electronics items you actually don’t need? You got earphones with your mobile phone. You could have used it. Why not spend on something more useful like clothes.”

Raj just stared at her for few seconds. He then loosened his grip, took his hand out of his jeans’ pocket and signaled to leave the topic. They chat there for some time, had dinner at a good restaurant and left.

Next day Raj gifted his sister two beautiful earrings.

BF - BestFriend

I am a guy and I have got a best friend, a girl. Now Because of the typical Shahrukh dialogues and the mentality of the Indian society, everyone expects and wishes you two, to fall in love. 

“You are made for each other.” “You don’t realize now but soon you will fall in love.” “Why don’t you tell it publicly?” 

Our friends kept torturing us with such sentences every now and then. It even got better when my mom got angry on me for similar doubts. After a time, I even stopped explaining people. I just said we are not but never argued anymore.

This all stopped when she got COMITTED with another guy.

Now, those who were expecting us to fall in love, I hate u guys. I am still just her best friend and we will always remain like that. Our friendship is very strong and we are even more than, I don’t know what to compare with. It’s just like Jai and Veeru of sholay. Yes, our friendship is as strong as portrayed in that movie.

I know you are sad now, it doesn’t look good. The hero, luckily it’s me (yipeee) has not got the girl L . But the story is not about getting the girl. It’s about what happens when your best friend gets committed. Trust me, if your best friend is still single never ever accept the girl/guy they like. Find a strong flaw they can’t refuse but also keep praising him/her for other things to avoid suspicion.

You can’t wish them at 12o’clock at night on their birthday like every year, because this time they are already talking to someone from 11:30.

Your gifts just vanished because they have spent much more on a romantic date and are now asking you for credit.

They would keep chattering about their love and it will just keep you get jealous (if you are not committed).

The trips and vacations are still being planned but without you.

You now have to bring gifts keeping in mind their choice and their lover’s choice.

Their call comes always busy and they might call you back the same day, an hour later.

You could have made fun of anyone, now you got an exception.

They start hiding things from you.

You always doubt if that ‘special person’ is really better than you. (I am better)

Once they are in the chains, you can’t flirt with them. Another person steals the right for that. They might even know you and trust you but after some time they will surely be affected by the bond and closeness you share. They will surely envy and ask your friend to stop behaving like this. Your friend will mostly tell you but you will know even if they don’t.

Bestfriends, it hurts very badly to know that we lost our right over you.

Their lovers, keep doing what you do. You guys are POSSESIVE and we hate you for that, but it brings a shine in their eyes. It’s that thing that always keeps our anger away and we are even much happier for you two.

But, I still hate you.

Status

"I love you Richa."

"Raj, you are a nice guy but we can’t be together."

"Why, we work in the same company. We spend a lot of time together. You don’t have a boyfriend and you even like me. Where does the problem lie?"

"See, there is a large difference in our status. I don’t want to break your heart but I don’t want you to feel humiliated later. My whole family is very rich. I own a sedan and you come to the office in the bus."

"Just wait for a year and even I will get a car of my own. Even I have got big dreams and I will fulfill them."

"You really think that in the meager salary we get, you would be able to buy a car. Even if you get a displayable car in installments, it would just dig so many holes in your pocket that you would not be able to get any other comforts of life. My family members are very rich and you can never match their status with this job."

"Is status everything? Yes, I might be a little poor but I am a self-made man. The car would be from my own hard-worked income and not inherited from my family. I love you a lot and I will always keep you happy for sure."

"Don’t behave like kids Raj. We are not in college that love is the key source of being two people in a relationship. We have to take care of the future. Status is the key feature in the professional world. You are a very good guy but we just can’t be anything more than friends. My friends spend thousands for just partying one night. We go adventure sporting once a month and I don’t want you to be left out each and every time."

"But…"

"No, Raj. You have been saving money from 5 months to buy a sports bike. I know its harsh but I don’t want you to keep any hope later. We belong to a society where money is the most important factor and if you or I were so intelligent to get a huge package then we would not have been in this company. We can’t be together and just accept it. I am sorry but its better that we meet again tomorrow when we are nothing but friends."

Raj smirked as she closed the door behind her. He moved out of the office and dialled a number.

"Hi dad, I understood now what you meant to say. I don't want to prove anything now."

A week later, Richa introduced Raj, her boyfriend to her friends at a pool party. They all were jealous of his luxury car.

I wish it was mine

I wish it was mine.

The girl I had been in love with,

The dreams I had been waking with,

Stars lighting my path till now,

I wish I could get this all somehow…

I also wish for the pains to be mine,

Happiness will only, then look divine,

I think, what if I could fly like a bird,

My wishes I wish were not so absurd…

You know, once I got hold of some coal,

Tried for diamonds, just made some holes,

Am I now, just crying like a baby?

I wish I could, just maybe…

I cry in pain and laugh with joy,

Am I not being played like a toy?

Proud, I don’t have anything to be,

I wish atleast my freedom was free…

The sun is burning, deserts ain’t fertile,

I wish the truth was, I have a smile,

Things I lost, if I could re-define,

I just wish, I wish it was mine…

An act, an Actor

He had been waiting for the lead actor to arrive. It had been 2 hours and everybody was silently cursing the star. He wished he had been at his place.

He came to Mumbai with a dream. The dream which brings thousands of people here every year. He was the star of the theatre circle at the Delhi. His average looks and simple physique never let him dream of stardom but he knew he could do great in supporting roles. He didn’t lack in talent to shake his belief.

Three years had passed and he was yet to get a decent role. He got in some films but he had to point out his presence in them. He couldn’t go back, he had already brought enough shame on his family.

The spot boy called him. The director was set for the scene.

“Cut”, the director shouted.

Everybody started praising his acting. The emotions, the expressions were just excellent.

He looked at them and smiled within. He went and took the small amount for the small role. He came out and started laughing. He didn’t act for them. They were praising his acting but he hadn’t given them anything. 

He was doing the role of a beggar not eaten anything for many days. 

Air-crash

The meeting had been over. The flight from bangalore to Delhi was in 2 hours so he rushed to the Airport. Raj quickly made with the check-in and the security, once again troubled him asking to open his small suitcase. The branded stationary these days can be used as dangerous instruments with slight modification, given the metal content in them. He took a light snack and waited for the boarding to start.

He took out his i-pad and checked for mails and sent his reports. The important works need to be completed on the journey to save him some time for his family dinner. Life goes hard as you keep climbing the stairs of success. The flight attendant announced for the passengers to board and he made his move.

He took his seat in the Aisle. Family and kids often ask him to exchange a window seat so he hated it. He kept doing his work until the pretty air hostess forcefully closed it. He wished to reach home sooner. His son graduated today and would have been home by now with his degree. He so wanted to attend it but couldn’t.

A sudden jolt and the i-pad fell down. The oxygen mask dropped down before the announcement could even start after the beeping noise. The jolts continued. The airhostess was terrified and didn’t know how to react. The thud and the plane started losing altitude. Everything happened in an instant. The mind was still working but it had accepted a very hard reality. Raj knew his life was important but he didn’t even try to save it. He started viewing everything in slow motion. The havoc and the screams just deluded away. He could see the every strand of hair of the lady sitting next to her flowing slowly and effortlessly. He for the first time realized that there were co-passengers in the plane who were just like him. Liquid coffee was floating in air and made shapes like he used to make in clouds. The plane in which he had travelled for infinite number of times now attracted him with its architecture. The shape of dome and the yellow lines everything seemed to be new for him. Unlike others he didn’t had even a single wrinkle on his forehead.

He saw a young girl sitting in the seat infront shouting his name. He could see his daughter trying to hold him in his arm. His son just went on stage to get his degree and he was there sitting with his beautiful wife. His wife, the most beautiful women he had met in his life. He regret for the first time that he would not be able to tell them how much he loved them.

He extended his arm to console and comfort the girl infront. Something hit his palm and SMASH. Raj stood up and picked up the broken pieces of glass. He needs not to get so lost in the stories he is writing.